Does “having it all” really have to mean “doing it all”?

Today, I’ve been doing some thinking about outsourcing a bit of household stuff.

With Hot Husband and myself both working (him, full time, and me, part time shiftwork), and two busy kiddos, at different schools, with different activity schedules, I’ve been finding it increasingly difficult to keep up with everything that needs to be done.

Hot Husband is an epic guy. He’s never been one to spout off any of that “bringing home the bacon” crap as being his primary role. Even when I was the stay-at-home parent to two tiny ones, he honestly viewed my role in raising our babies as MY primary role, and thus never hesitated in rolling up his sleeves to do his part in the household arena.

We share the load fairly, yet even with us both going our hardest, and the kids pitching in, the fact that we are all in so many different places, at so many different times, means we are still falling behind.

And given that we are both pretty orderly, and appreciate a tidy home, the concept of just looking past the mess, or shutting doors on rooms, isn’t something that’s working for us.

I’m no martyr. I’m more than happy to hand over the reigns to anyone and anything that can make things more manageable! So, this week, I’ll be making some changes to how we do things.

During my nursing and midwifery training(when I was pulling 50 hour unpaid weeks!!), and into my first few years of work, we had a wonderful cleaning lady who appeared like magic every second Friday, making my house and my soul sparkle. Then, I got cocky. I thought I could do it all myself (I totally can’t). I thought saving the money would be worth it (it really wasn’t). I thought I was somehow failing part of my maternal duty by calling for help (don’t worry –I know how dumb that sounds).

Anyway, I’ll be phoning this lady back this week, cap in hand, begging and pleading for her to return and make us all shiny again.

I’ve also recently taken to ordering a couple of home cooked meals per week, which get delivered to us courtesy of the lovely Sal from Nourished Ballarat which has seen our nutritional intake skyrocket on the nights when cooking just hasn’t been an option. Again, I had some initial guilt around this decision. But don’t you worry. That was rapidly squashed by a big piece of Sal’s lasagna.

A psychology/anthropology podcast that Hot Husband listens to referenced outsourcing as vital and essential in households with two working people. I think I like this guy!

But what do you guys think?

I’m curious to know what you guys out there are doing? Do you outsource any of your stuff? If so, what, and how? And if you don’t, I’d love to hear your strategies around doing it all yourselves too. I know there are meal planners, and housework charts and all of that jazz… Tell me what’s working for you?

I don’t care if you work, or you’re at home, or somewhere in between… Share your secrets! Really interested to hear how everyone else is out there managing the juggle…

Big love,

One thought on “Does “having it all” really have to mean “doing it all”?

  1. Mine is easy. I learnt recently ‘Peace not perfection’. This means that I find the point that I am happy with (eg. My kitchen bench cleared, floor clean, washing away, couches empty and dishwasher packed and running. This is my Peace Point. I don’t need shiny, spotless or everything perfect. It has changed my life!!


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